May 23, 2012

to my unfriends

An open letter to my friends, family, people I knew in high-school, obscure relatives, neighbors, church members, college chums, acquaintances from the library/mom's group/swim class/pediatrician's office/etc, and the checker from the supermarket:

I  have unfriended you on Facebook. You should not take it personally. I unfriended Facebook as well. You see, Facebook and I - we have different agendas. We were able to coexist for a time, and ending the relationship was bittersweet. Much like when the plant you work hard to kill for 2 years finally dies (don't judge - it was an awful, ugly plant drug out of the dumpster by a husband who shall remain nameless). Facebook and I have been in a loveless relationship for some time now. Yet I kept pouring time and energy into the relationship and getting very little return - other than wasted time.

The reason I chose to delete my account is two-fold. Maybe tri-fold. I feel like I'm talking about diapers now. Anyhow - the main reason is this - at the end of nearly every day I would lay in bed and think about how I wish I had time to read and study my Bible more. Then slowly the realization that I DID have the time, I just chose to spend those valuable moments on social networking rather than spiritual networking would hit me. Every night. Finally, I caught on. Facebook for me has become more important that growing in God. Yet I claimed that was the main priority in my life. See how that wasn't really working out? So, when a hand causes you to sin, cut it off, right?

The second reason Facebook got my boot in it's butt was because I had too many friends. Not everyone participates in Facebook, some more than others. I was spending time reading/investing/Facebook stalking people that quite frankly, I have no relationship with. High school chemistry was over 13 years ago. So many "friends" on my list aren't people I would even stop and chat with at the supermarket. I want to spend my time investing is lasting, fulfilling relationships. Real ones. With people I know in real life. I love Skype. I talk to my sister (who lives something like 4 million light years away) nearly every day. My mom, dad, grandparents, in-laws, aunts, cousins, and several close friends, all of which are spread across the globe all are on there. And we get to see each other smile when we talk. And  we have to stop talking sometimes because we're laughing or crying so hard. It's the next best thing to holding their hands. As far as internet applications go, it's really a beautiful thing.

The third reason I made this decision was because, while there are several people on Facebook (who I do deeply miss chatting with so easily) there were more people I didn't care about. No, it's not that I didn't care about them - I do care very much for their souls. I just didn't care what they had for breakfast. Or what their dog threw up. I'm not referencing anything specific at all, so if you recently posted about either topic please don't feel this is about any specific person or situation. I'm just over it. For now. When I return to Facebook (read: I will be back most likely) it will be after reason #1 is firmly rooted in my habitual system. I also will not be "networking" and friending only people I am, well, actually friends with (refer to #2).

So, I'm sorry for the hurt feelings. Consider my offer to Skype, talk on the phone, or visit in person in exchange. Do not be offended. The offense was on my part to my awesome God that I let it get as bad as it did. I figured I'd get some flack for it, but really, it's not about you. And it's not about me. It's about my God. Upward not inward. And I'm finally going to bed tonight feeling blessed by a much better Face and a much better Book.

-In Christ,
Mama Cas


Anonymous said...

Amen. :-)

Kelli Jean said...

I am so inspired by your decision. I think I may have to cut the FB communication as well. I am always blessed by reading your blog :)

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